The Downside of Technology

Technology has a ton of benefits.

It is because of technology that such an enormous amount of information is constantly at our fingertips, that we can stay informed with regard to what's going on all around the world--locally, nationally, and globally, that we can communicate with people over great distances with minimal effort, and that we are able to reconnect with folks from high school, college, and childhood with the click of a mouse. It really is quite amazing how much the advances of technology offer us. The list most certainly could go on.

But technology is not all good.

It has a way of complicating our lives. More specifically, if we are not careful, it can detract from the quality of our relationships.

Have you ever been in a conversation with someone when their cell phone rang? Did they answer it? How did that make you feel? Why is it that the person calling is often more important than the person standing right in front of us? I recently saw a mom at the park with her son. She spent the better part of 45 minutes talking on her cell phone while her son desperately tried to get her attention the entire time. I didn’t get the impression that this behavior was out of the ordinary for her. Smart phones allow you to carry the world in your pocket. And that can be incredibly convenient. But that world in your pocket can interrupt life and pull you away from the people right in front of you.

I read somewhere that the average person has 100 friends on facebook. Last time I checked, I had 700 friends. I’ve always been a bit above average in the social sphere. Just kidding! But who can honestly sustain a quality relationship with 100 different people simultaneously—let alone 700? Now I realize that facebook is not predominately used for maintaining close relationships. But my concern is that it is replacing them. Not everyone deserves an explanation of your life. But see, what happens when you put your life on facebook is that you provide an explanation to everyone regardless of how close you are to them. And without realizing it, you offend those closest to you because they get the same explanation everyone else gets at the same moment in time--or perhaps later if they don’t check facebook every 5 minutes! What’s the difference between your best friend and one of your other 100 friends if they find out the same information at the same time through the same website? Nothing. Best friends don’t keep up with one another by watching each other’s facebook posts.

Perhaps I am being a bit harsh—but then again, maybe not. A friend of mind recently found out that her grandpa had died through facebook. She had just spent the three previous days caring for him in person, but he died while she was at work. A cousin in Florida felt the need to go public with the news about his death before each family member had been contacted. Facebook got to her before her own family could. Can you relate? Have you ever found out some important information about someone close to you at the same time as everyone else? How did that make you feel? I once found out some really good friends had their baby through a co-worker that saw it on facebook—despite the fact that we had been told we were on their speed dial. That made me feel pretty crummy.

I am not down on technology. But I do think it has some downsides. And my main concern is that many people are not aware of those downsides. And as a result, they allow the world in their pocket to take precedence over the world in front of them--they mistake the quantity of their relationships for the quality of their relationships. What would it look like, then, to engage technology in appropriate ways that are truly constructive? What would it look like to utilize technology in ways that enhance our lives without detracting from them? These are important questions for us to consider—not only for ourselves, but also for the next generation.