Clinging to God

A few days ago at our weekly staff meeting we were leaning into a practice called Lectio Divina (Latin for Divine Reading).  One of our core values as a leadership team is to cultivate intimacy with God.  We believe the best thing we can do for our church community is to lead from a place of deep intimacy and total dependence upon God.  Lectio Divina is a way of reading the Bible that has been used for centuries to help people connect with and hear from God.  There are a variety of ways one can engage in this practice, but here is how we did it at staff.  We broke into small groups of about three to four people and selected a passage of Scripture.  The passage we selected was Psalm 63.  We then followed a threefold progression—each step beginning with a reading of the passage.  After the first reading, each person selected a word or phrase that stood out to them.  After the second reading, everyone shared how that word or phrase connected with their life.  After the last reading, we took turns sharing how we sensed God inviting us to respond to that word or phrase.  My experience with this exercise was quite profound. 

One particular phrase stood out to me during the first reading.  It was the phrase “I cling to you” in verse 8.  As I began to chew on this phrase a bit, I was reminded of an experience from just a few days before.  I had been at my parents’ house over the weekend.  They live on a lake and we often go over there to swim and play in the water.  My son Tighe and I had been playing in the water and I had been gradually taking him out deeper and deeper to stretch his comfort zone.  I noticed that whenever we got past the dock area he would get nervous and cling to me.  He would wrap his arms around my neck and say, “Hold you” (which really means, “Hold me”).  I remember responding, “Tighe, I’ve got you.  Daddy would never let you go.  You can trust me.” 

During the second reading I began to ask God how this word or phrase intersected with my life.  I was reminded of this swimming episode again and something began to connect for me.  I began to sense why I was being drawn to that phrase and why this particular swimming experience came to mind.  I realized that in my own life I was being called beyond the dock in a variety of areas.  You see, we all experience things in life that stretch us—a lack of finances, a new job, a medical problem, etc.—things that take us beyond the dock.  My life is full of them right now.  But as I began to think about some of these things, I noticed something different about my son, Tighe, and me.  When I am beyond the dock—beyond my current comfort zone—my immediate inclination is not always to cling to God.  My immediate reaction is often to just try harder.  I think, “If I can just kick my feet hard enough or move my arms fast enough, perhaps I will stay afloat.”  Now look, it is very important when you realize something about yourself that needs to be changed—especially if you sense God pointing it out—not to judge it, but simply agree with it.  It’s not about judging yourself.  It’s about recognizing what is already true.  The fact that you are perfectly loved by God just as you are ought to provide the courage to recognize what is already true about you.  So at this point in the exercise, I just admitted this was true.  “God, it is true that I am overly self-reliant—that I often depend on myself rather than you.”

During the third reading everything came together.  I began to contemplate how God might be inviting me to respond with my life.  Once again the swimming episode came back into my mind.  As I replayed that experience over in my mind while keeping that phrase “I cling to you” in mind, I sensed God inviting me to cling to him—to put my arms around him and say, “Hold you.”  I sensed God saying to me, “Mac, I’ve got you.  I would never let you go.  You can trust me.”

What if our first inclination was always to cling to God?  Imagine how life would be different.  Imagine the stressors of life driving you into the arms of God instead of just stressing you out.  Imagine the challenges of life encouraging you to rest and surrender instead of leading to exhaustion and burnout.  So often we respond to stress and anxiety by increasing our effort and activity.  We run around at a frenetic pace.  We flop around in the water trying to stay afloat and gasping for air.  All along God is right there with his hand outstretched, inviting us to trust in him.